Deny the Stalker

Set clear boundaries. This is not your fault. You are under no moral obligation to be nice. Say “NO!!” once using unambiguous, unemotional language. You want no relationship now or in the future. That’s it. Once. Then, no further engagement. Never initiate contact. Accept no gifts. Reasoning, explaining, pleading, begging, arguing or negotiating will not be effective. Do not feel sorry for him. Do not be tricked by his promises. Do not humiliate or threaten him. Give him nothing, which means zero encouragement. Deny him the control he seeks.

As a tough person, you are naturally alert and aware. With this said, take all threats seriously. Treat all delusional individuals as dangerous. Keep a log of the harassment. Call the police. Get a restraining order. Have an emergency plan in effect to get to a safe neutral location. As appropriate to your comfort level, carry a weapon. Tell friends and co-workers and neighbors about the stalking. Tell your manager and/or building superintendent. Get support. Believe in your power to do whatever it takes to protect yourself. He is dangerous. You are dangerous.

Reward favors the bold.

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